I wanted to start a series of “Psychology Sessions”, where you can have a glimpse into what I have gone through with my psychologist/past counsellors.
I want to use this platform to be open and honest about how self-improvement happens. It’s not just waking up one day and feeling different. It’s difficult, emotionally-laboured work that takes time and dedication everyday. If anything resonates with you, please let me know in the comments.
*Be aware that there may be distressing/triggering content.*
In anticipation of my next appointment, I wanted to make a post about the counsellor-client relationship and how powerful it can be.
Let’s begin The Session.
In this particular session, I was expressing my concerns about a life-change that occurred. I told N* that part of me wanted to halt my study plans. I was overwhelmed and anxious about how the year would pan out.
She said half-urgently that she had to stop me right there. I was curious. What did she think?
“When you’re sitting in that chair, in this room, I fight for you.”
I was shocked. After a few moments I concluded that this statement spoke to me in a way that nothing has spoken to me before. In all sense of the word, I felt completely supported. I felt heard. I felt cared for. It was like a weight I’d been carrying immediately halved. I am not carrying this burden alone.
This is what being understood feels like as a client. This is what sessions are aimed to do. This is why I am studying in this field.
My psychologist went on to say that no one has to stop their life because of someone else’s mistakes. Time is needed to cope with big life-changes but that doesn’t mean to also give up on life goals.
By the end of this session, I felt lighter. I could breathe without as much labour and I didn’t feel like I might crumble at any second. There are good days and bad days yes, but I wasn’t a ticking-time-bomb anymore.
What I learned
1. Shit happens.
From this session, I learned to find motivation during the difficult times. Shit happens. Sometimes, frequently, surprisingly and without fault of our own. Of course, I’ve always known this. Part of starting this blog is to share my personal experiences of “shit happening”. Reminders are always handy though!
2. There are good and bad times when living in community with others.
Living in community, big or small, we may find ourselves affected by another person’s actions – both positively and negatively. It is up to us to fight tooth-and-nail through the brick walls and get back to the light. To do our best, with what we have in those moments.
3. Speak up.
Like a fellow blogger @sickocean wrote about, speak up. Both in situations where you need to stand up for yourself but also in situations where you feel heavily burdened by life’s issues. Open up to people or a person you trust. Yes, we are all different beings with different life-stories and therefore, may not respond in the way another would ‘want’, but, expressing ourselves is still massively helpful and beneficial for our mental health.
Even if speaking to a professional isn’t in the cards right now, remember to FIGHT FOR YOU.
Even through the pain.
Even through the darkness.
Fight for you.
Live the life you deserve.
Make choices freely without guilt.
Put yourself first this time.